I so desperately want the upcoming Video Game Awards on December 4th to be done well, for legitimizing the industry a bit more so that certain types of people will stop poo-pooing video games and realize the sheer artistry that goes into them, from graphic design to programming to storytelling.

Alas, I think a mighty deck is stacking up against it being anything but crap.

1. It's on Spike TV (entertainment for MEN)... what's that for MEN thing all about? I thought that was what Skinemax was all about.
2. Your host- David Spade. This little blonde leprechaun and his sarcastic humor will just about put the nail in the coffin of treating the industry as more than something he can throw disdain at for two hours.
3. It's coming to us from the MGM Garden Arena, where the last thing televised from there was Iron Chef USA and we know how that only lasted 4 episodes. The venue has the stink of mediocrity on it.
4. I can't wait to see the list of presenters, not to mention their witty cue-card banter...

Spade: I don't really play these things, but here to present the award for
Best Soundtrack are the gravity-defying Pamela Anderson and Carrot Top.

(Crunching Rock music and a smattering of applause)

Pamela: Thanks, David.

CT: Wow, Pamela! I haven't seen a woman as good looking as you since Tommy
Vercetti was running that shark porn operation in Vice City!

(Canned laughter)

Pamela: And I wish I could take a crowbar to you, Carrot Top, like I did to the undead nurses in Silent Hill!

(Cut to David Spade making a Home-Alone-hands-on-the-side-of his-face face)

I just want it to be good, and pray the execs aren't going for "edgy". They always fall flat on their money-controlling asses when they aim for that.